he's growing up

so yesterday i pass by the playroom and see michael doing a puzzle and say, 'michael, who's the man?' i do this a bit and tell my boys that they're the man just to let them know i think they're great. so he says, 'you're the man, daddy' and i respond, 'no, you're the man, michael'. to which he says, 'daddy, why am i the man? is it because i winned? is it because i ran real fast, daddy?'

dangit... this kid is 4 and he's getting caught up in an acceptance by performance mentality already. this breaks my heart a little. i mentioned sunday that he already has this desire to win when we play games or do puzzles. part of me thinks this must be bad parenting on my part. part of me thinks i'm real screwed up and just passing it on to my son. and part of me thinks he's human and i should just expect this sooner than later. so i tried to explain to him that he's the man because i love him, and that will never change. so i asked him, 'why are you the man?' and he says 'because i love you daddy'.... arrrgh!

i'm finding it a challenge to describe God and my faith to my kid but this has been one of my best opportunities. his question reminds me of the psalms where david says, 'what is man that you are mindful of him and the son of man that you care for him?' and again where he says, 'you knitted me together in my mother's womb'. my guess is that he's asking a question that we are all asking at some level and one that he'll continue to ask for the rest of his life...